Why Having a Will Is One of the Most Loving Things You Can Do

Most of us know we should have a will. And most of us don’t have one. According to a 2023 Caring.com survey, only about one in three American adults has a will or living trust — despite the fact that a clear majority say passing assets to family is important to them. The gap between intention and action is striking. And understandable.

Writing a will means thinking about death, and thinking about death is uncomfortable. But here’s a different way to look at it: a will isn’t really about dying. It’s about the people you love — and what happens to them when you’re no longer there to help.

What a Will Actually Does

A will is a legal document that tells the world three essential things:

• Who gets your assets.

  Your home, savings, car, personal property — a will specifies who receives what. Without one, state law decides, and the result may look nothing like what you would have chosen.

• Who is in charge.

  Your will names an executor — the person responsible for carrying out your wishes, paying debts, and distributing your estate. Choosing someone you trust for this role matters enormously.

• Who raises your children.

  If you have minor children, a will is the only legal mechanism to name a guardian. Without it, a court makes that decision.

A will can also express things that aren’t about money at all — who should receive a piece of jewelry with sentimental value, what should happen to a family heirloom, or simply a note about why you made the choices you did.

What Happens Without One

Dying without a will is called dying “intestate.” When that happens, your state’s intestacy laws determine what happens to everything you owned. These laws follow a rigid formula — typically spouse first, then children, then other relatives — that may not reflect your actual wishes or your family’s real needs.

Beyond the legal complications, dying without a will often leaves families in a painful position: grieving while simultaneously navigating legal proceedings, family disagreements, and financial uncertainty. The probate process can take months or years. Legal fees accumulate. Relationships can fracture.

A will doesn’t eliminate grief. But it removes a significant layer of confusion and conflict at exactly the moment your family is least equipped to handle it.

Common Myths About Wills

What a Will Doesn’t Cover

It’s worth knowing what a will can’t do, so you can plan accordingly. Assets with named beneficiaries — like life insurance policies, 401(k)s, and IRAs — pass directly to those beneficiaries regardless of what your will says. The same is true for jointly owned property with right of survivorship.

This is why estate planning professionals often recommend a broader approach that includes not just a will, but also:

• A durable power of attorney (for financial decisions if you become incapacitated)
• A healthcare directive or living will (for medical decisions)
• A review of all beneficiary designations on your accounts

How to Get Started

A simple will doesn’t have to be expensive or complicated. Here are your main options:

• Work with an estate planning attorney.

  The gold standard, especially if your situation is complex — blended families, significant assets, a business, or minor children. Costs typically range from $300–$1,000 for a basic will.

• Use an online service.

  Platforms like Trust & Will, LegalZoom, and Nolo offer guided will creation starting around $100. These are appropriate for straightforward situations.

• Use your state bar's resources.

  Many state bar associations offer referrals to estate planning attorneys and some provide low-cost or pro bono services for qualifying individuals.

Whatever path you choose, the most important step is simply starting. An imperfect will created today is infinitely better than a perfect one you never get around to making.

Helpful Resources